What It’s Really Like Being A Fan Of A Horrible Sports Team

I like the New York Knicks. I love the National Basketball Association. This brings me to a fork in the road when it comes to my mental state. The basketball offseason is heating up, moves are being made, and it’s been exciting. Paul George to the Thunder, James Harden’s giant extension, Nick Young potentially joining Javale Mcgee on what might be the greatest team of all time on and off the court. All these moves have one thing in common: The absolute dread I feel every time a see a competent move made knowing the team I love will not be making one for itself. It’s something I’ve been used to for a while being a Jets fan as well (Christian Hackenberg is the next Peyton Manning) so I’ve decided to start an entire blog just because I need to get this off my chest. Being a Knicks fan sucks so goddamn much. It’s like when you take a test in class and you get a 36% while everybody you know gets a 98%, only every test comes back with the same result and there’s 365 a year. Any time a basketball conversation starts up I’m so eager to join but know the minute I do it’ll be “How’s it goink with Phil?” or “Bro go watch more Tim Hardaway Jr highlights”. Just because I like the most embarrassing sports organization of all time does not mean I don’t know about anything else. You think I only watch the Knicks all year? I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. Knowing that no game matters is draining. I’ve watched Sasha Vujucic and Jason Smith play major minutes. Joakim Noah is getting paid about $72 million more than he deserves for this year and the next three. I’m literally on the internet at this moment watching my favorite team try to give Carmelo Anthony away for no picks and no good players because God wants me to suffer. And there’s no relief from that because I like the Jets. The goddamn Jets. Do you want to guess my favorite Jets player of all time? Chad Fkn Pennington. Sports depress me. The only hope for our franchise is spending the summer getting hammered at USC and if he doesn’t pan out there’s nowhere to go. I miss old Ladainian Tomlinson. I miss Jason Kidd (You heard me). I’m surrounded by good sports but can’t escape this hole. I’m always at least 20% sad and it’s affecting my family and friends. I think I might just end my sports fanhood once and for all. If only there were anything for me to have some hope in…